Sunday, 2 October 2016

Day 4

So, we came back off our holidays to The Letter. 

The appointment was on the same day around the same time as my Friend's Mum's Funeral. So He went to his appointment and I went to the funeral. I wish I'd been able to be in both places at once. 

It was kind of a one stop clinic. 
Blood tests, pretty painless
Prostate exam - finger up the bum - a little uncomfortable but pretty painless 
Endoscopy of the bladder via the urethra - "FUCKING HELL IT HURT" and that folks is a direct quote from my man. He said having a thin tube "up my knob brought tears to my eyes." 
Ultrasound Scan of the kidneys.- totally painless 

Until..the radiographer tells you that something isn't right. 
Back in the room with the Junior Doctor who tells you ( in his foreign accent making it tricky to really understand says He ) that the ultrasound showed a large mass on your left kidney approx 110cm by 60cm. It could be cancer, this or that or the other. He said back at home, once the C word was mentioned. Everything else went blank. 

So we wait now for an appointment for a CT scan. Family are told. Work is told. Everything goes on hold. Sleep has gone. I'm doing my best to try not to worry because worry steals your happiness etc and does absolutely no good. 

We are almost up to speed. CT scan and beyond next post. 

Day 4-Done. 


  1. You will start on the merry go round, they say you have choices, but you do what they say, in some ways it's good, they know what they are doing, your in their hands, saying that they will work with you, keeping you informed to what ever level you want. At no point did I ever feel they left me behind, I'm the type who wants to know and understand every thing. The shock will subside, together you can beat the arse off cancer, xxxxx

  2. Oh Rachel, What can I say? Hope when HG has his op that will catch it all and there is no more. I don't know how you can be so upbeat on the other blog when all this is going on around you. I really feel for you.

  3. Thanks for sharing - I hope it is helping to write it all down.
    J x

  4. Oh I know I really shouldn't laugh Rachel but HG's quote about his knob had me in stitches. It's just the sort of thing Mark would say.

    Took my Nanna for some results once and the the nurse had to decipher everything the Doc said to us. I suppose you get used to an accent the more you hear it, but honestly we couldn't understand a word he said. We just kept looking at her for help lol.

    It's unbelievable sometimes how badly timed things can be isn't it. I totally get his mind going blank at the C word but I bet even if you were with him yours would have done the same.

    You sound so positive and upbeat as Carol says but I really hope you feel you can come and shout at the world when you need to as well. Take care. xx

  5. blimey Rachel. Don't know what to say. Other than I am sorry this is happening. xx

  6. Hopefully, once the initial shock has passed, they will tell you both everything again so that you take it all in properly. I don't know why they bother to keep talking once they have said That Word because almost nobody hears another word that is spoken.

    I hope that the operation and treatment follows swiftly now and then you and he can really start kicking that dreadful disease where it hurts it!

    Sending lots of positive thoughts your way and I hope that sleep returns soon because that will give you both more strength to fight back hard.

    Helen xx
    (Sorry always to comment as Anonymous but I don't have any of the profiles it asks for)

  7. Oh Rachel, don't know what to say. It's horrible and not fair. Thinking of you and hope you'll soon be able to say Kidney gone, cancer gone! xx

  8. Rachel, I missed the post on your other blog until today so I've only just read all of this. Much love and positive thoughts coming your way to you and your family. Xx